This prospect was dismissed for riding too straight, and not having his own bike.

Just because there aren’t many BMX riders in Hanoi doesn’t mean we (read I, Stunt Munky) can’t have a club of some sort. When we say “aren’t many”, we mean approximately one. We are perfectly willing to be shown the error of this statement, which goes to show that we are a growing organisation with great hopes for future development.

If you want to get in on the ground floor of this growth sport, thereby increasing your cool tenfold, you should read through the clubs rules for prospective members.

• Only an existing club member can prospect a new rider for membership. Members can only sponsor one prospect at a time. This ensures the club will grow in an orderly, if slow, fashion.

• Full club members shall vote to approve each prospect. Should approval be given, the prospect will be granted a pair of furry ceremonial hazing pants.

• Prospects must wear their furry ceremonial hazing pants to three, daylight club riding sessions, during which they will be evaluated for full membership.

• All prospects shall bring their own bike (of whatever specifications they see fit) and must not whine to ride a cooler set of wheels owned by another club member. Prospects must be able to pull a stunt cooler than a wheelie, which must be witnessed by all club members, before being considered for full membership.

• After meeting all requirements for full membership, existing members will vote on the prospect’s membership. A unanimous vote is required for granting of full membership, which means you should get in now, while there is only one member.

• Should the requirments for full membership not be completed within the span of three club rides a prospect may request, and be granted, an extension by the club chairman.

• Should the requirments for full membership be in some way beyond the capability of the prospect (i.e. the prospect is a dog), said prospect may be voted an "honorary member" just to keep them happy. They will have the opportunity to re-prospect after a period, the length of which being determined by the chairman, based on a mental slide rule calculation of their prohibitive condition.   

• A prospect may be exiled at any time. This is non-negotiable exile, and moaning about just makes you look like more of a loser.

• All members shall attend every ride, unless pardoned by the chairman, or if the chairman isn’t going either, in which case, it’s not a club ride.  

• All full members must pony up some dough for the betterment of the club, the amount of which will be determined by the needs of each event. Failure to pony up dough will be taken to mean you don’t like being in the club anymore and will be told to leave.   

• All WAFL members will make the effort to learn and retain the knowledge of the club rules, mission statement, secret handshakes and favourite secret bia hoi congregation points.

That’s about all for now.

Stunt Munky, WAFL Chairman, for The Good Life